With a toddler of my own, something that resonates with me in my current season of motherhood is to let the mess unfold for a period of time to allow me to focus on a particular task. Our homes are training grounds. This graceful reminder has come to me again and again through books, sermons, and podcasts, as I have worked with children and families for many years, and now have a family of my own. This is very true!
As an organizer, planner, and minimalist, it would be very easy for me to be uptight about household messes. By the grace of God, I am at peace with the very natural messiness that unfolds each day as we explore, create, use our imaginations, and as my toddler pulls everything out just for the heck of it. Oh, go ahead and put some music on too.
Let me clarify natural messiness. I do not mean uncleanliness or perpetual clutter. I do mean that as I am focusing on a particular task, I allow my toddler to play with a hodgepodge of things in our house. By the end of my project, there are pots and spoons spread out that have been used as drums and drumsticks. There are towels that have been used for “helping” to clean the table and chairs. Stuffed animals have had a picnic. And, lots and lots of books are scattered about.
One practical way to keep the mess at bay is to organize toys into bins and keep them in a closet or somewhere out of reach. This allows for a bit more control in what is available, along with household items that are up for grabs, to include in imaginative play.
The living room may look like a tornado swept through leaving wreckage behind, but you have completed your project, and your children are content in their creativity. Begin the transition to cleaning up by first cleaning up your work area (mine is almost always the kitchen). When your area is clean, guide and help your little one(s) in putting things back where they belong. If you have older children, they are certainly able to be efficient in cleaning up. Sing songs, recite scripture and catechism questions, and even dance a little!
It’s likely, as it is with mine, that your children will come and go from their project to yours. Maybe one or all of your kids are interested in being a part of what you are working on. Allow them to participate in some way, even at a very young age. Don’t be afraid of them making a mess while they help you. Rest in the fact that it is going to happen. When it does happen, resist the temptation to act in annoyance and anger toward them. If you are working on something that they truly cannot help with at all, then gently direct them back to their project. Spend a minute or so there with them, engaging with them in what they are working on, before going back to continue your work.
This is not a one-size fits all approach. Maybe you have a baby who needs to be put down for a nap, so as you have quiet time with the older sibling, incorporate taking care of the home as a part of your time with them. Have thoughtful conversations as you clean together. How this plays out will vary from day to day and from family to family.
Remember, your home is a training ground. Let the mess be blessed!
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Mama Lamb 